Ang Pag-ibig nga Naman

"Thank you and goodnight, Melissa."

As Melissa gave Carlo a friendly kiss on the
cheek, she found her lips locked with Carlo’s.

"No, thank you Carlo."

Carlo watched as Melissa walked away. Soon,
it will be all over. He brought out his list
from his pocket. For the last time, he looked at
the peace of paper in his hand.

There was only one thing left to do.

"Melissa," Carlo shouted.

Melissa turned around and looked back at Carlo.

"I will never forget you!"

In the dark, quiet evening, everything became
bright for Carlo and everything became loud for Melissa.

Carlo saw a bright light.

And Melissa heard a sound of a gunshot.

* * * * *

At around ten in the morning, Carlo woke up
from the noise of his alarm clock. After another
drinking session with his friends last night, he
finds himself in the solitude of his desolated room.
Soiled clothes were lying as well as books and
magazines were displaced everywhere. His room
was pretty messed-up.

Just like his life: pretty messed-up.

This has been his life since Melissa told him
the news. When they broke-up a year ago, Carlo
didn’t felt a thing, not even the slightest remorse.
Not until Melissa told him the news.

She was getting married to her fiancee.

The past few months become the gradual destruction
of Carlo’s life. Drinking sessions with friends
have become a nocturnal routine, as well as
absence in work to nurse a nasty hangover.

Unshaved and somehow disoriented, he stares
hopelessly at himself in the bathroom mirror,
somewhat trying to ask himself where have he been.

And all he got was a stare of a complete stranger.

For a few moments Carlo continue to stand infront
of the bathroom mirror, then he noticed something.
His reflection was holding a piece of paper.
He was holding a crumpled paper and he opened it.

* * * * *

"Good morning everyone!"

Everyone in his office stared at Carlo as he
entered. As if they saw someone who was long gone.
Neatly dressed, shaven and emitting an aura of
freshness, he mesmerized everyone and went directly
to his boss’ room.

"Good morning, Sir!"

"Carlo! Where was the report…"

"Here it is, Sir. Complete in a presentation
burned in this CD ready to blow your clients
off their feet," Carlo quickly disrupted his boss.

"What have gotten into you? You look normal again,"
his boss replied.

"I just woke up from a terrible nightmare."

"Good for you. Good for me. Good for the clients.
Welcome back, Carlo."

Carlo smiled and left his boss’ room and went straight
to his cubicle.

As he reached his cubicle, he dialed a number and
called someone in his cel.

"Hello," Melissa answered.

"Hey gorgeous! You free today," Carlo asked.

"Why?"

"Nothing much. I just got some errand to do and
I would like to bring you along."

"Uhmmm… I still have a few things to tend,
you know…"

"The wedding? C’mon, it’s only one day. Your
fiancee shouldn’t worry. For old time’s sake?"

"Okay. What time?"

"I’ll pick you up before lunch."

"Okay."

"Til then. Bye."

Melissa seemed confused after hearing Carlo’s
voice in her cel. She haven’t heard from him for
some time and that she just changed her number a
few days ago."

* * * * *

Just as he said, Carlo picked up Melissa at her
office. They went to a nearby restaurant for lunch.
Melissa was staring at a man she used to love.
Some old feelings still lingers in her. But she
rather keep them all inside her in solitude. Then
Carlo broke her silence.

"So what’s keeping you busy, aside from getting
married," he asked casually.

"Uhmmm… nothing much. Just the usual. Clients
who dream big and pay little," Melissa replied.

"Shall we?"

"Where?"

"I just need to tend some errands. You’ll see."

Carlo brought Melissa in an orphanage they
used to go to during their anniversary. Carlo
still remembered how Melissa loved children. For
a few moments, Melissa found herself enjoying her
time with the children. And then she realized
something was not right.

She shouldn’t be there with Carlo.

"Why did you bring me here?"

"You forgot easily."

"What?"

"Nothing. I just wanna go here. This is the first
time I went here since we broke up."

"I remembered when we still went here together."

"Happy anniversary."

Melissa stood infront of Carlo filled with
confusion. She cannot understand why he brought
her in the orphanage.

* * * * *

"You’ve been silent since we left the orphanage."

"…"

"Carlo, why are you doing this?"

"What?"

"…"

"Okay. The orphanage wasn’t intentional. It was
just a spontaneous idea. When you agreed to come
with me, the idea just entered my mind. And besides,
today was supposedly our anniversary. It’s just so
funny if we went back there after all this time."

"So you found it as a joke?"

"No. I found it heartwarming."

"…uhmmm, where are you bringing me anyway?"

"You’ll see."

* * * * *

"I haven’t been here for a while," Melissa said.

"I know you’ll be surprised. I haven’t also been
here for a while," Carlo answered.

They arrived at Carlo’s home in Antipolo at around
five in the afternoon. Carlo’s mother was surprised
to saw both of them. They still don’t know that the
two of them had broken up.

"Hi Mama," Carlo greeted her mother.

"Carlo," Mrs. Gomez replied.

"You still remember Melissa?"

"Good afternoon Ma’am," Melissa greeted Mrs. Gomez.

"How could I forget your beautiful fiancee? So when’s
the wedding? C’mon here child and give me a hug,"
Mrs. Gomez answered.

Both women hugged each other. Melissa suddenly
became uneasy with the fact that Mrs. Gomez doesn’t
know what had happened between her and Carlo. She
found herself starting to get mad at Carlo.

"So what have brought you two here?"

"We’re just visiting you Mama."

"You should have called before you arrived,
so that I have prepared a special dinner."

"No Mama. We won’t be long. Melissa’s busy with her
wedding."

"You naughty boy. I haven’t met Melissa’s parents.
And now you two are getting married? Why are you
putting all the burden to Melissa in preparing for
the wedding?"

Melissa blushed in embarrassment. She doesn’t know
what to feel, whether to get mad at Carlo for not
telling her Mom, or to feel sorry that the two of
them broke up. She really liked Mrs. Gomez.

"You don’t understand, Mama. Well, I’m quite busy
tending a lot of errands."

"Okay, let’s just talked about the wedding later.
Wait here and I’ll just prepare dinner."

As Mrs. Gomez was about to go to the kitchen, Carlo spoke.

"Mama, I love you."

When Mrs. Gomez reached the kitchen, Carlo whispered
to Melissa.

"That’s our cue. Let’s go."

"Carlo, what do you think you’re doing? We have just
arrived here and you’re mother’s preparing dinner."

"I still have some errands to do, remember?"

"Oh great. At least let’s say goodbye to your mom."

"That would be impossible. She won’t let us leave
until after dinner."

"…"

And the two of them sneaked to the front driveway
straight to Carlo’s car.

* * * * *

"I can’t understand why you are doing all this, Carlo,"
Melissa said.

"You hungry?"

"First the orphanage. Next your mom. What’s all of these?
Are you trying to win me back?"

"No."

"So why all these special places? You know this is
not easy for the two of us."

"I forgot something in my office. We’ll grab dinner there."

"You’re not hearing me. You’re shutting me out…"

And tears started to form in the corners of Melissa’s eyes.

"You know I always understood you. When you left me,
it was your decision. I just set you free because I felt
you really wanted out. Now that I’m asking just for a
day with you, you judge me of not hearing you out?"

"So what’s this all about? I’m really confused."

"Sometimes, the greatest questions don’t need answers.
Please take my word for it."

"I’m still not buying it."

"Okay. I’m leaving. I’m going somewhere. I just wanna
do the things I won’t be able to do after I leave."

"…"

"Satisfied?"

"I’m hungry," Melissa answered with a smile.

* * * * *

When they arrived at Carlo’s office somewhere in Makati
at around 10 in the evening, Carlo’s office was closed.
A guard recognized Carlo and let them in. City lights
have somehow illuminated the dark corridors of Carlo’s
office. All cubicles were deserted.

"What are we gonna do here," Melissa asked.

"You’ll see, Carlo answered."

"No tricks, Carlo."

"Trust me."

And all Melissa was able to do was smile back at Carlo.

Melissa followed Carlo to the elevator. Inside,
Carlo pressed "P" for penthouse. The light indicating
the building floors rose from the ground floor to the
penthouse. The darkness and the uncertainty of what lies
ahead of them scared Melissa.

The elevator reached the top floor of Carlo’s office
and its doors opened.

What Melissa saw at the penthouse left her breathless.

Amidst the darkness of the hallway glowed numerous
candles that seemed like stars the lit the whole floor.
A string quartet played songs that they used to loved
when their still together. And in the middle of the
spacious penthouse stood a candlelight dinner for two.

"I don’t know what to say," Melissa uttered to Carlo.

"Just say you enjoy everything that’s happening right
now," Carlo replied.

Melissa knew that she enjoyed every moment that’s
happening before her eyes but she decided to keep
it to herself. But her eyes gave herself away;
glitters of tears lingered in the corners of her
eyes. Even though she didn’t say it, Carlo saw it
in her eyes and he knew she enjoyed everything that
he prepared for her.

And for him, that’s what matters most.

* * * * *

After dinner, Carlo brought Melissa to her house.
They arrived at Melissa’s place at around past midnight.
Inside Carlo’s car, they sat in silence.

Then Melissa’s defenses finally crumbled and she
broke their silence.

"I’m sorry."

"For what?"

"For everything. I know I should have given you a
second chance but I didn’t. And now I’m getting
married in three weeks, and I still continue to hurt
you by letting you love me hopelessly."

And tears finally rolled over Melissa’s cheeks.

"I’m the one who should ask for forgiveness. Since
the day we broke up, I deliberately suppressed all
emotions that I should be feeling. Grief. Anger.
Despair. Hope. But when I found out that you’re
getting married, I started to feel, one by one,
all those emotions that I’ve tried so hard to keep
away from myself."

Carlo clutched the steering wheel of his car and stared
at the nothingness of his car’s windshield.

"Things are different now, Carlo. We both know we
have now different lives."

"I know. That’s why I met you today."

"?"

"I should have loved you the way you truly deserve…"

"Stop it."

"I should have asked for redemption when I still
had the chance…"

"I said stop it."

"I should have let go of you the moment I found out
you’re happy with your new life…"

"Please Carlo. You know this isn’t easy for both of us…"

"I should have died together with all the hopes and
dreams that our love created…"

"STOP IT!!!"

Carlo continued to stare at his car’s windshield while
Melissa’s sobs created an eerie rhythm of despair
inside Carlo’s car.

* * * * *

It was around two in the morning. Nearby houses
stood aimlessly in the dark of the night. Carlo
and Melissa sat silently inside Carlo’s car for
the past two hours already.

"I just wanna see you before I leave," Carlo said.

"…"

"I’ll be leaving everything behind, especially my
old life. I finally decided to start a new one."

"…"

"I prepared this day for you to show my gratitude.
I just don’t want to say how much I’m thankful of you.
I want you to feel it and never forget it.
I should have done this when we’re still together
but we both know I didn’t make you feel how much I
really love you."

"You don’t have to do all of this…"

"But I have to. My conscience has been eating me up
because of the guilt I got from taking you for granted…"

Finally, after all this time, Carlo looked at Melissa
thru the haziness of his tears.

"…"

"Hush…"

"…"

"I’ve already forgiven you a long time ago."

"…"

Between the sobs and the tears, Melissa found herself
comforting Carlo with a long, passionate kiss.

* * * * *

At around four in the morning, Melissa decided that
it was time for her to leave Carlo.

"So this is it," Carlo said.

"I guess so," Melissa answered.

"Thank you and goodnight, Melissa."

As Melissa gave Carlo a friendly kiss on the cheek,
she found her lips locked with Carlo’s.

"No, thank you Carlo."

Carlo watched as Melissa walked away. Soon,
it will be all over. He brought out his list
from his pocket. For the last time, he looked at
the piece of paper in his hands. Words written in
the paper were stained with his own tears.

There was only one thing left to do.

"Melissa," Carlo shouted.

Melissa turned around and looked back at Carlo.

Melissa watched in horror as Carlo aims a 9mm Beretta
pistol at her.

"I will never forget you!"

Carlo quickly aimed the gun at his left temple and
squeezed the trigger.

In the dark, quiet evening, everything became bright
for Carlo and everything became loud for Melissa.

Carlo saw a bright light.

And Melissa heard a sound of a gunshot.

She stood there as Carlo fell to the ground.

Melissa’s sobs lingered in the silence of early
morning. She slowly walked towards Carlo’s lifeless
body, still trembling from the terrifying ordeal she
witnessed. As she stared into Carlo’s dilated pupils;
she noticed Carlo was clutching a piece of paper.
She picked it up and opened it.

Melissa read, "Ten things to do before you die."

Written and crossed out were:

"1. get new haircut…"

"2. finish report…"

"3. eat a nice lunch…"

"4. visit orphanage…"

"5. visit home…"

"6. tell mama I LOVE YOU"

"7. surprise HER…"

"8. ask for FORGIVENESS…"

"9. KISS HER FOR THE LAST TIME."

Melissa almost lost consciousness upon reading the
last entry on Carlo’s death wish.

"10. die with the one you love."

And she remembered the last look in Carlo’s eyes
before he died. He couldn’t find the courage to
complete his death wish. He couldn’t kill Melissa.

Melissa found herself sitting beside Carlo’s body.
Her tears almost completely blurred Carlo’s death wish.
She then felt guilty for Carlo’s death.

She looked again at Carlo’s death wish and read the
last entry.

"10. die with the one you love."

She picked up the 9-mm Baretta, aimed at her left
temple, smiled, and pulled the trigger.

It was around five in the morning when Melissa
body fell beside Carlo, creating an illusion of two
lovers together in an endless dream.

What do you think ?

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