I can’t reach my license unless you hold my beer. Hey, is that a 9mm? That’s nothing compared to this 44 magnum. Hey, you must have been doing 125 to keep up with me, good job. Sorry officer, I didn’t realize my radar detector wasn’t plugged in. I was going to be a cop, but […]
A policeman is on scene at a terrible accident – body parts everywhere. He is making his notes of where the pieces are and comes across a head. He writes in his notebook: "Head on bullevard" and scratchs out his spelling error. "Head on bouelevard" Nope, doesn’t look right – scratch scratch. "Head on boolevard…" […]
A tourist asks a man in uniform, "Are you a policeman?" "No, I am an undercover detective." "So why are you in uniform?" "Today is my day off." Related Stolen Alfa Seven foot high steel fence . duling vs. bulag Chasing a Nissan Z
A police officer stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. "But officer," the man began, "I can explain." "Just be quiet," snapped the officer. "I’m going to let you cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back." "But, officer, I just wanted to say," "And I said to keep quiet! You’re […]
"When I saw you driving down the road, I guessed 55 at least." "You’re wrong, officer, it’s only my hat that makes me look that old." Related Deaths in custody Top 10 things not to say to a cop when he pulls yo… Stolen Alfa lexapro
The Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD), The FBI, and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals. The President decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it. The CIA goes in. They place animal informants […]
A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license. He says "Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses." The woman answered "Well, I have contacts." The policeman replied "I don’t care who you know! You’re getting a ticket!" Related Sex crime car adobe Pulis Daw Mercedese bends
A man who is driving a car is stopped by a police officer. The Officer: "You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone." Man: "No sir, I was going 60." Wife: "Oh, Harry. You were going 80." Officer: "I’m also going to give you a ticket for your broken tail light." Man: "Broken […]
A police officer pulls over this guy who had been weaving in and out of the lanes. He goes up to the guy’s window and says "Sir, I need you to blow into this breathalyzer tube." The man says, "Sorry officer I can’t do that. I am an asthmatic. If I do that I’ll have […]
Policeman’s brain
A client of a hospital where they made brain transplantations asked about the prices. The doctor said, "Well, this Ph.D. brain costs $10,000. This brain belonged to a NASA top scientist and costs $15,000. Here we have a policeman’s brain as well. It costs $50,000." The client asked, "What? How’s that possible?" The doctor replied, […]